


Acts of Grief

by Novamore



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Angst, ErzaJane, F/F, Grief/Mourning, Heavy Angst, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Underage Drinking, Requests, Tumblr: FTLGBTales, Tumblr: femslashfairies, ftlgbtpride2020, teen erzajane
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-29
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:29:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24972340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Novamore/pseuds/Novamore
Summary: There was a part of her screaming to make this right. To have the balls to look Erza in the eyes and fix this.She suppressed it.
Relationships: Erza Scarlet/Mirajane Strauss
Comments: 4
Kudos: 32
Collections: Fairy Tail LGBTales, I Take Pride in What I Am 2020, The Mirza|Erzajane Top 10 Project





	Acts of Grief

**Author's Note:**

> Anon asked: What about some erzajane angst with the prompt “I never actually loved you” or “you thought I was serious?”. Here's some teen erzajane angst!

They stood across from each other in the cramped guild closet close enough that Mirajane could hear the rapid beating of Erza’s heartbeat but still so far away. Keeping her calm demeanor, Mirajane avoids looking at her directly. Instead, she looks down at her wrist rubbing her thumb over it lightly. She winces subtly, not wanting the other girl to see. Instead she pretends to check her fingernails feigning disinterest in the current situation.

Erza, for her part, did not move. She crossed her arms leaning against the back wall. Her gaze was steady and unwavering locked onto the mage in front of her. Erza had on her usual face of indifference, a stone-cold mask that even the toughest of situation couldn’t break. Mirajane had only seen her break that mask once.

She looks down and clears her throat. She makes sure her voice is strong as she says, “You know, I could scream and tell the guild you’re kidnapping me right now.”

Erza’s expression did not change, “You are not being kept here. You can leave anytime. Stop being so dramatic.”

Mirajane scoffs meeting Erza’s eyes for the first time that day. Looking at Erza was always enough to make Mirajane’s anger start to rise. It was always there, simmering ever since she lost one of the only two people who ever matter to her. “I’m being dramatic?! You just grabbed me and pulled me in here in front of everyone and now you aren’t even going to say anything? You’re just standing there watching me like a creep.”

“What should I say Mirajane?” Her voice took on a rougher, harsher tone. Finally cracks in that ice-cold mask started to appear. “What should I say to you right now.”

Tension quickly starts to rise in the room as did a strange to need to apologize, to explain away the crease forming in Erza’s eyebrows. Mirajane suppresses it. The only person she can afford to have warmth towards in this world is Elfman. Everyone else is not worth her kindness.

“Answer me Mirajane! You’ve been avoiding me for an entire week now!” Suddenly Erza was right in front of her. Gone was her usual neutral expression. Instead her lips press in a snarl and her fists clench at her sides. She was angry. Angry in a way Mirajane had never seen her before despite their constant fights and bickering. This anger wasn’t motivated by competition or rivalry. This was something different.

“I think it’s pretty clear I don’t want to talk to you. Take a hint!” Mirajane took a step closer to glare further into Erza’s face. She ignores the way her heart beats faster the closer she gets to Erza the way she always does. “Go play with Natsu and Gray and leave me alone or I’ll tell the guild that you’re obsessed with me.”

As expected, Erza didn’t back down. She never did when it came to Mirajane. It wa one thing Mira loved to hate about her. “Tell the guild? What, are you going to tell them? That you snuck some beer and got drunk behind the building? Are you going to tell them that you were so wasted you nearly tripped in your own vomit? Are you going to tell them that when I helped you back to your room you wouldn’t let me go and begged me to stay with you? Are you going to tell them that you told me you _loved me_ then _you kissed me?_ Are you going to tell them that Mirajane!?”

That day flashes in her mind. They had just sold the rest of Lisanna’s clothes and neither of the remaining Strauss siblings were handling their grief well. As always, Mirajane didn’t allow her despair to show. She pushed it all down to be the rock Elfman could hold onto as he wailed for their little sister. Gildarts had showed up and offered to take Elfman into the market for a little retail therapy. Before they left, Gildarts had paused and asked Mirajane is she was okay. As usual, Mira lied. After they walked off she ran into a forlorn Cana who always seemed to shadow Gildarts whenever he was in town. She asked Cana to sneak her a barrel of whiskey and the two sat behind the guild building talking about everything expect what was upsetting them. She remembers Erza appearing and scolding her like a child. Remembers then arguing until she proceeded to throw up her lunch onto the other girl’s shoes. Remembers being carried piggyback up the hill to her apartment and gently placed onto her couch. Remembers the panic that overcame her at the thought of Erza leaving her behind the way everyone seemed too. She even remembers pressing her lips to Erza’s begging for someone she loved to just _stay_ for once.

Of course, she remembered. How could she forget.

There was a part of her screaming to make this right. To have the balls to look Erza in the eyes and _fix_ this. She suppressed it. “What? You thought I was serious? Don’t be so dramatic Erza. We both know I was drunk.”

Mirajane walked towards the door keeping her back to Erza as she said, “don’t bring this up again.” With that, she walked out never looking back.


End file.
